If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
