I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
