Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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