Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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