I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
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It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
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The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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