If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize
