try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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