He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
