walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
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She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
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I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize