I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize