So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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