Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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