I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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