and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
