actually, I'm a sock model
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
