I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
