Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now

  (917): View more from New York City

  Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now (917): Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway http://tfl.nu/aof1
  Replies (6) Good night (1100) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  Call me "white mamba"

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake

  (251): View more from Alabama

  It is white.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): Call me "white mamba" (334): Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake (251): It is white. http://tfl.nu/1p0c
  Replies (5) Good night (1217) Bad night (1642)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum. http://tfl.nu/5o8q
  Replies (9) Good night (4572) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.

  (1-914): View more from New York

  maybe it's her son

  (914): View more from New York

  thats not any better.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out. (1-914): maybe it's her son (914): thats not any better. http://tfl.nu/9ktq
  Replies (23) Good night (702) Bad night (3229)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works. http://tfl.nu/grey
  Replies (62) Good night (1761) Bad night (3036)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts http://tfl.nu/nzvy
  Replies (34) Good night (977) Bad night (4136)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less. http://tfl.nu/ezlm
  Replies (15) Good night (1910) Bad night (3869)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault. http://tfl.nu/rtqq
  Replies (20) Good night (1762) Bad night (4630)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final http://tfl.nu/g3gv
  Replies (7) Good night (2625) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid. http://tfl.nu/grub
  Replies (9) Good night (2785) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP. http://tfl.nu/nipi
  Replies (11) Good night (3370) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (936): View more from Texas

  Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (936): Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check http://tfl.nu/ivap
  Replies (4) Good night (893) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before. http://tfl.nu/gsfk
  Replies (3) Good night (1023) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum http://tfl.nu/f5r0
  Replies (7) Good night (864) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference http://tfl.nu/y7l1
  Replies (1) Good night (617) Bad night (286)

Randomize