So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
