what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
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