Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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