you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
