I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
