Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
It's shark week go big or go home
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
