She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
You're a waste of cheezeits
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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