She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
