windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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