You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I queefed so loud it echoed.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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