would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I would fuck him just for his dog
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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