their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
