You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Randomize
