i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
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