i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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