Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
