Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
