So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
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She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
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And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.