we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize