We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
