We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
