I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Randomize
