so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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