Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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