I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
