Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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