moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize