And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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