Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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