Your mouth is God's brothel.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
