i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
