Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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