your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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