There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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