'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
We left the knife in your bed.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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